Updated: Sep 3, 2020
Dr. Lakeya Stewart
Grief… it’s a seemingly simple 5 letter word with a complicated definition. It is the process or period of one’s response to a loss. Of course, this is not a scientific definition, but rather it is my definition. As a former Hospice Chaplain, I know the nuances and complications that grief takes on. You see, there is no “proper” way to grieve. Books and literature tell of the strategic thought behind this process as they look at trends and generalities. The reality is that grief sucks.
In a period where Covid-19 has snatched the life out of many who we started 2020 with, we also find ourselves dealing with the untimely deaths of friends and loved ones due to other causes. I am not exempt.
Just recently, I learned that the life of one of my absolute best friends was tragically taken away from her. I cannot believe she is gone. We had just spoken for 53 minutes a day or so before she presumably died. She and her two children had just spent Thanksgiving with my family in our home. I am still in shock as no one deserves to have their life ended in this manner. No one…
I am left to put together the pieces of my broken heart as I face each day. Each passing day reminds me of the good times we spent together…the laughs we shared, and the tears we cried. I am reminded of a friendship that stood the test of time. I can honestly say we were friends until the very end.
Can I be honest? I am crushed. My soul hurts and longs for answers; yet, I know deep down inside that I will never have all the answers. As I have prayed and cried myself to sleep, I have been reminded of how thin the line is between life and death. Literally, one minute we can be here and the next we are gone.
Friends, the time is now to make amends with those who have wronged us. The time is now that we exercise and hold onto our most holy faith. We are living in perilous times. Tell your loved ones that you love them because there WILL come a time when we must meet our maker. What we sing about, talk about, preach about, and proclaim that we believe in will be a reality. “Praising my Savior all the day long” will not just be words to a song, it will be our opportunity to live out what we say we believe. So, as I cry, scream, and continue to live, I ask you to please “don’t take my grief away” as grieving is complicated. It takes time and there is no “proper” way to grieve. My prayer is that you too will also feel empowered to grieve what you have lost. Let the tears flow…it’s ok. I will pray for you, as you pray for me. Be Blessed.